He said he could see himself marrying you, didn’t he?
He painted the picture for you, held you real tight and pointed his finger in the general direction of the possible yet vague future he saw with you: three kids, two dogs, one big happy family. All smiles, all the time.
And he told you he’s never felt like this before, didn’t he? - Nobody could make him feel this way. Nobody has.
And he used that as an excuse, didn’t he? - He had real feelings for you. It scared him, so he left.
He told this to you as a ticket to enter your life again, didn’t he?
He’s done this before, hasn’t he?
He used those same words again, didn’t he?
And he twisted your words – Twisted them so much, twisted them and manipulated them to the point that you began to believe that you were the one who needed HIS forgiveness, didn’t he?
And you still love him, don’t you?
And you’re listening to these words, and all you can think to yourself is how I don’t know him like you do. I don’t see his eyes filled with regret like you do, or hear his voice penetrated by sorrow at the thought of losing you forever, like you do.
And you feel sorry for me, don’t you? You console yourself and tell yourself that your man isn’t the same as mine.
You tell yourself that he’ll change this time,
Rearrange his priorities this time
He’ll call you just to hear your voice this time
Introduce you to his friends this time
Make your smile his objective this time.
And you find these hopes comforting, don’t you?
And from the bottom of my heart, I hope you’re right.
Because you deserve to be right.
You deserve to be treated with respect and gratitude.
It should not be a rarity for a man who “loves” you to put you first.
And you should not have to sit at home each day, wondering if this is the day he’ll change his mind about you and leave you again for something he considers to be greater.
Because you are greater.
You are greater than all those times he said he would call and he didn’t.
You are greater than the petty words he attempts to use as a band aid to blind you from the hurt he caused the last three times he walked out on you.
You are greater than the excuses you make to your friends for him, the wild excuses you know sound absurd even as you say them knowing that the truth hurts more than this picture you’ve painted of him.
You know I’m right, don’t you?
And if the roles were reversed you would probably say the same thing to me.
You would look me straight in the eye and tell me that there’s better out there, that there is hope out there, that there is love out there.
And I would look at you and say, “Yes, but one day, he’ll love me.”
